When you just want to cry...

This morning my best guy friend and I headed to downtown Chicago, so that I could go to Nordstrom and find a dress for a Gala that I am attending tonight.  I know...I know talk about waiting until the 11th hour.  I just did not have the time to get a dress.

I got to the store just as it opened.  There are several Nordstrom stores between my house and the city. I certainly did not have to go all the way to the city, but I did.  I knew they would have a large selection and all the sizes.

Well, I tried on dress after dress and I felt horrible.  I just wanted to cry.  And that awful negative self talk started.  I am fat.  I am so ugly.  OMG how did I get this way again.  I seriously have not had these feelings for maybe 11 years and I hear I am again.

I wanted to cry.  I wanted to ugly cry.  I really did not want to go to the Gala.  My best friend helped me not cry and stay positive.  I found something to wear and while I do not feel great.  I am going tonight and I am hopeful that it will be fun.